I haven’t really rambled about any of this yet so here goes;
/ In some ways I’ve been feeling like I’m existing on a different plane to other people. Loads of students walk past a visually impaired guy with a stick, and only I offer to help (nevermind that when he said no, I said ‘ok (smile) see you later’ awwwwkward). People start packing up before the lecturers are finished- they’re people too! People get up and walk away, or don’t listen when someone is sharing an incredibly personal and difficult story- when I could sit there reeling and processing for another 5 minutes. It sounds ridiculous, but it does feel a little that way. I guess it’s just that you never know what other people are thinking, or why they’re doing something, so it’s easy to think you’re the only one thinking it.
/ I volunteered to be student representative for my group (39 child nurses)- and I went to the programme meeting on wednesday- it was so interesting hearing what’s to come in the next few years, finding out the pass rates for the modules I’m doing right now- and the feedback it gets!
/ We’ve got a little group of 5 of us who usually sit together, and can be relied upon to wait for each other or meet up. It’s nice to have someone ask about you or want to sit with you. It’s interesting not to be an ‘add on’ member of something. We all don’t live in conventional Uni halls; 3 with their parents (under different circumstances); S, B, G, then me with Boyfriend and the other girl, L, in some private student halls with no one else from our course. We haven’t met up outside of Uni yet but we’ve hung out a lot, over lunch etc.
/ I tried trampolining club last night with S- it was awesome. We finished lectures at 5 and it didn’t start till 7 so we caught the bus back into town and wandered around then went to Barburrito to get some food. She told me lengthy stories of her summer, and boys. We got the bus back up to Uni, walked through campus to the sports facilities, found a changing room and found the sports hall where it was. It was awesome! We chose the wrong group though- we went total beginner but we weren’t really. We both got sore hands, and scratched elbows. It didn’t finish till 10, then of course I had to wait an age for the bus. It was a lot of fun but I felt terrible when I woke up the next morning- so groggy. While I was out Boyfriend had a steak & beer night with 4 friends but they’d already left by the time I was back. I’d love to go trampolining again but £85 for sports club membership I’m not gonna use, and then £50 for the team. Stacks up! I’m gonna think about it.
/ I’m really enjoying the real ‘nursing’ parts. Thinking about ways to get a child to eat their lunch, finding each others pulses, and learning to bath babies. Some of the modules are just… silly. I can see what they’re trying to do, get us to thinking about how to work effectively in a team that has different disciplines in it, but they way they’ve chosen to assess it is just mad and pointless. Oh well! I’ll survive.
/ There is always a part of me, that in the back of my mind is saying – you don’t have to do this you know. You’re not going to work as a nurse most likely (because we plan to move to Canada). You could just stop now, and start living; start a family and get on. But on the other hand, I do really want to do this. It’s really interesting so far, but who knows how I’ll feel once it steps up a gear. Apparently the second year is the hardest year, because you’re out the community the whole time, which is not something I’d be interested in doing really which makes it doubly hard. I don’t know. I’m giving it a proper chance, and most likely I’ll finish- as long as I don’t get pregnant by accident before I’m done!